The years fell and before I knew it, we were having lunch and catching up.Pure remains one of my oldest friends and whether we see each other or not, we both know we always have each other. Material may not be published or reproduced in any form without prior written permission.Zukiswa Wanner (born 1976) is a South African journalist and novelist, born in Zambia and now based in Kenya. All my best friendships I can recall have always been marked by tears. "No, we need our truest friends to have our backs in our saddest moments because those are the friends who understand that there is nothing Sure, maybe our worlds are completely falling apart around us, but our real friends know that we'll always recover somehow.Right on, Hasson. She can send me a text on Whatsapp despite years of our not seeing each other and if she needs anything, I will move what mountains can be moved to ensure she has it sorted. Said we cry {Cry, cry together} There ain't nothin' wrong with me {Cry, cry together} There ain't nothin' wrong with you {Cry, cry together} We're not the only people in the world who go through ups and downs And changes and turn arounds Girl, yes I was hopeful that she would sit down next to us and join us singing and crying. The acquaintances who I have never been able to open up to, or who have never been able to open up to me so that we share tears of joy or laughter, have always remained just that. I immediately sat down next to her and remembered that as her mother was working in Masvingo, my mother was also at that time in far away Harare. Through this, we actually  become even more in touch with our own selves.It's as if having someone cry with you validates your pain, and although it may hurt more, we can begin the process of overcoming hardship sooner when we are able to find peace.So, if your friend decides to open up and pour his or her heart (and eyes) out, take it as a compliment. 'Cuz if I cry, you cry, we cry together. I concluded that should these two young boys not be damaged by a world that tells boys and men not to cry, I was probably seeing the seeds of a future great friendship.Unlike Mercy, I did not laugh in this Pure-Zuki moment, but rather smiled as I passed them some Kleenex. Equitable and democratic societies are needed to fight against this The historical record shows that Malawi’s difficulties under Hastings Banda were evident at the very moment of the country’s foundingUniversities and other higher education institutions have to develop ways of preventing or dealing with rape and other damaging behaviour I loved my grandmother more because my mother was discipline and my grandmother was indulgence as so often happens.But perhaps it was guilt of not loving my mother enough that made me sit down next to Pure, put my thumb in my mouth and joined her in singing, “Dai ndiri shiri …” Soon I too was crying as heartbreakingly as Pure was doing.After what may have seemed like hours, but what was probably 45 minutes, Pure’s older sister Mercy — who was a year older than us —arrived and wondered why we were both crying. He or she considers you a good friend.Having a friend who you can share a laugh with is easy to find.However, sharing a good cry without the fear of embarrassment or rejection is the true sign of a loyal companion.Crying could very well have been an evolutionary tool used in ancient human groups to form closer relationships with select members of communities such as families and partners, according to research.Evolutionary biologists from Tel Aviv University looked at crying in research performed at the school's zoology department in order to determine its uses in human society, according to Dr. Oren Hasson, one of the researchers at TAU, says,So, all relationships in prehistoric times were built from the same foundation as our relationships today: Just like how our ancient ancestors couldn't just trust anyone to be around as they cried for hours on end after barely missing whatever animal it is they hunted back then for dinner, we can't just trust any frenemy not to Snapchat our ballistic tear sesh after a solid binge of "OITNB. To which he then turned to his friend and asked: “Georgie, kwanini unalia?” He had not known the reason, but on seeing his friend Georgie crying he too had joined him. I never did find out why Georgie was crying, which led his friend to cry, but I remember, when I left them after tickling both of them, they were laughing so hard together even Georgie probably forgot why he was crying.Here is to knowing people, old or new, that we can be vulnerable enough around so we can cry to and with as we laugh.These are unprecedented times, and the role of media to tell and record the story of South Africa as it develops is more important than ever.For all the latest information and advice from the Department of Health relating to Covid-19, please visit All material © Mail & Guardian Online.

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